my wife doesn't care when i'm sick

When I am sick I want to be left alone, just let me sleep it off. Ziff Davis, LLC BBB Business Review. Third possible explanation: your wife doesn't want to get sick and thus avoids you? I truly don't think he SEES the damage that all of this caused me AND him, mainly because he still doesn't think his ADHD has that much affect on our daily lives. Besides his kids being a priority (see TruthBTold's post), I have seen a lot of men that are used to being babied when they are sick. It seems to b My Mother in law said to my husband :" You should help her, she is going to fall". During those 30 days I saw a good neurologist and was diagnosed with an Autoimmune neurological condition that can be life threatening. When my wife gets sick I take over and watch our daughters, 4 and 1, so she can sleep. Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. in Psychology. Please share ~ the relief is amazing! #1. If one or both of you dont have time to talk about things, you can schedule a time that works better. I was really pissed and hurt that he didnt seem to care. It is not only me he has no sympathy for, it is his children as well. Nothe kids aren't "more important" than her. I would like to see him live with this and all the pain and cognitive dysfunction it causes. Duped again. Some people have zero bedside manner. When I was3 months pregnant, wetook a trip to Mexico. If I'm sick or hurt (e.g. Germaphobe type thing? (not a good sign). This is a great take. But at the end of the day if it is really bothering you well then you need to talk to him about it and tell him how it made you feel. He's afraid someone is going to see that he couldn't 'do this, and it will make him look bad to someone "out there". So cultural. I was a great person to be around but the lies hurt and changed me. It sucks but thats what it is. Clearly you know it's a problem and you're still in that relationship and most likely going to have kids with him yourself and then act like oh no poor me I still got married and had kids with the guy that's treated me like crap since day one. I invited him out to breakfast on a snowy Saturday morning since I thought that would be nice. So a few months ago I rang him to say my asthma was bad and I needed to get to Very hard to comprehend and maybe that means we are ok.It is illogical and very sad to live with like that from both sides. But I do know some women that like to take care of their men, to the point of coddling them. BUT, we need to sell the house and the realtor is going to tell him to paint it back the way it was, because it won't sell being all jacked up. And that look on his face is what I will always remember. We can't FIX some of this stuff on our own. I couldn't handle it. So I had been barfing all day long.almost going to the hostpital and was sicker than I had ever been before or after except with Appendicitis as an adult. What is often harder for me is the hundreds of other things small and large that have made our lives SO MUCH more difficult than it ever had to be. But still, if I do get sick and need something, he's there, doing whatever. And for this, I am truly, deeply sorry. WebA major medical diagnosis can lead to doctor-recommended changes in your spouses diet, physical activity level, medication routine and need for rest. Sorry guys, I just had to vent and get it out of my system. WebIt is not a crime to not care for a spouse when they are sick. He still ignored andhung by the pool by himself. Always. It was my truck. I have an illness. And I have failed you, but in finding your voice you have helped me find mine and now I see. Of course, I got no help from him with ANYTHING for the 6 weeks my foot was in the cast. Yes, I chose someone who couldn't love,or who chose NOT to love. When I rarely get sick, my H is nice AT FIRST (for about 30 minutes), but then quickly falls into being angry, annoyed, and spiteful. We have elementary aged children and he works at a demanding job. Overthinking when my DH doesn't even think about it is a waste of good energy. I have that kind of love with my children - simple, all encompassing, comfortable, aware, connected, attentive and involved it is possible to have it and I think it is a normal and natural human endeavor. His answer,"Something you enjoy. As I'm still not feeling well, I worry I will say something harsh or angry and am looking for advice on how to approach her. We already talked and we good now. Submitted by sickandtired on Fri, 12/11/2020 - 08:44. In preparation, he never did set up a way to communicate with her (In the entire last year), did not reach out to her before or after the surgery. I could barely limp about and it was rapidly getting worse. He has not been diagnosed with ADHD (yet), but he may very well have it as well. You dont care about my illness. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. I am a loving, patient, kind person who wants a partner to weather the storms of life with. Not a very nice thing to do to someone you say you "love". Then he could fix all this stuff on his own, on his own timing, but it didn't happen. I had to step down onto the patio from the back door. The behavior, not the label, is what matters. It wasnt until recently, after many drawn out, emotional fights with you, that I decided to unpack my suitcase and work through my skeletons. Submitted by DependentOrigination on Tue, 12/13/2016 - 10:32. I will always do my best but not at the price of my sanity. Because in his mind, I'm supposed to be taking care of him.not the other way around. You can find even more stories on our Home page. It always boils down to me getting sick on purpose! Iris is somewhat of a unicorn a zebra unicorn even! Basically, if your partner doesnt have your back, things will start to crumble fast. Submitted by dedelight4 on Fri, 04/14/2017 - 06:51. Two months ago I broke my foot when some furniture landed on it, rather severely (first metatarsal). The former provides you both with a structure that can work (does for many couples.) This is not the life you want. If I could boil down the difficulties, it really does come down to lack of love as you described. Anyway, I got way off track here. We are at retirement age, but will never GET to retire. He might show it in other ways. Got plenty of time to think about it. I am at peace now, non-reactive for the most part, I don't care if he doesn't call or text me. No one has the right to USE someone to get love, and know you aren't going to give it in return, or pretend for a while, and then stop because you "got the girl", or "got your prize", that is wrong, and ADHD is no excuse for that. Theyve been together for 15 We don't have kids yet. I just need a bit of support lol anyway, my wife won't be back until 4 PM. I had a migraine headache and vomiting a few years ago and said I wanted to go to the ER and he said , "If you had a migraine your eyes would be sensitive to light." It dramatically affected my relationship for the worse. It tends to be E>S in females, and S>E in males, and S>E in ADHD regardless of gender. Don't just expect the world of her for multiple days when she's working already. Of course. Any time I am not at 100% to run the household, restock the coffee, cook meals, put the kids to bed, do the laundry, etc. WebBeen married 13+ yrs and anytime I am sick, according to him I act like I am dying. Jason and Maria want something entirely different out of the same marriage. Ive had back and chest pain on and off becoming more frequent. Its pretty normalized at the point. I mean, youre a grown man still complaining about a months-old twisted ankle so I wonder if youre exhausting to deal with when you dont feel well. And, of course, there is their sense that others (including you) are out to get them. Become a Mighty contributorhere. But, that wouldn't have lasted either, after she got to KNOW him, because she too would have wanted some love "in return". Very very low tolerance since this is completely unforgivable as it should be? By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Qualities many w ADDdo not possess. I explained that there was no difference really with him coming to bed at 3AM and I was already sleeping alone for YEARS. Before this point I even got out books on herbal medicine to treat dangerous infections, spent $70 plus buying all the herbs and tinctures and mixed them up for him to take. (Different situation for the writer of this post.) anytime I am not taking care of all of the chores (he works and comes home and rests-) he is vile. It was our 25th anniversarythe month after I returned and of course, I went all out. Otherwise she knows that I will go down and get whatever I want. I like the don't be upset if I pull a you on you comment. I pretend I am single and take care of me and my home for me. Run!!! You don't want to marry a man with kids, trust me. All this crap about his kids "coming first" is just thatcrap. When you marry, the two That's not even in my nature.". Submitted by dedelight4 on Sat, 04/15/2017 - 16:40. No excuse on either side. I will not beg for attention as I did in the past, crying because I was lonely. Bring her gatorade, soup, crackers, etc. Sorry you're feeling under the weather, drink plenty of fluids and rest, don't over do it. All I had to do was pay for the meal prep, and pick up the meals. It was like neither of us care that we were damaging our marriage. Partners are supposed to have each others backs, even when it doesnt seem like the best thing to do. But I'm still keeping out of the way and limiting the inconvenience. To be honest, if we were not married, I would not choose him as a close friend because he is judgmental, acts like a victim, is abrasive, discards people, is full of ideas and dreams that go unfulfilled and is very impulsive as well as talks incessantly about topics people can't grasp (i.e quantum mechanics- high IQ, low common sense). I dont know why, but for some reason, you chose to love me, and illness or no illness, it doesnt even weigh on your opinion and feeling of and for me. He says he used up the last of it while I was gone and that we can go out later and grab some when we are running errands! Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Many, many psychological studies have proven that kids who are "put first" in a family become helpless, more depressed, anxious, do worse at schoolare less psychologically stable than kids who have the adults in their lives clearly in control together. And I take. WHYDID YOU ASK ME TO MARRY YOU, and tell me you loved me and wanted to spend the rest of our lives together? SO did get angry at the slow healing process, and said this had better by done with by their birthday! Submitted by jennalemone on Sat, 04/15/2017 - 14:09. She came and went multiple times during the morning ignoring that I was still in bed and coughing a lot. I know your relationship is more complex than what I'm reading here in your postand it's not my business but he sounds selfish and self-centered. Stop selling your soul for sex, money or a sense of security. My husband would blame me for ruining his life. Haha I'm quite relieved to know even a couple who've been together for long have had to get through situations like this. My husband will care for me if I'm sick, and go get me things I need, which I really do appreciate, and I always thank him for this. So, does he want me around because he's afraid he's dying? You should probably be checked out by a doctor. He refused to tend to me as I was going into shock. (I think men dont care I'm going to be honesy) however when he is sick he expects me to stay in with him all day and if I go out hes constantly asking me to come home and gets angry if I'm out to long (he gets angry if I'm out to long anyway) he is unemployed and has a lot of time on his hands in this circumstance yet when I'm with him I have about 2 percent of his attention and that's just simple responses. Newly wed so some things are quite new. There are so many things he's broken or worked on, which have just become junk and broken down in the yard, garage and inside the house. Get back to loving yourself, believe in yourself because true love always IN all ways, shows up! I really would like some aspirin now and not in 5 hours! Do you think being obnoxious made him FOND of me? My mom used to go hands on care for me when I get sick growing up. They are more important than you are. Not only that, it seems as if he's always angry or aggravated when I need him. What should I do? When you are sick you deserve to have someone that does the things that show they care about your health and well being. If theres one thing you must understand, its this: You and your spouse probably can withstand more than you would expect. Submitted by The Bride (not verified) on Mon, 07/13/2020 - 04:33. "We can't afford it", but we can't afford to NOT call in someone. Empathy, love, and Gatorade are amazing to have, but the rest is all you. That's just I WISH I was kidding. I wanted to change to snow tires the week before but he always "needed" the truck for something. Reach out in an inviting way. I've been reading the posts for the last few weeks with great interest. WebMy girlfriend thinks I don't care for her but I do she's been sick for the past two days and I been trying to be nice by doing mostly everything for her I have to walk her to the bathroom give her medicine wash dishes pick up her groceries try to cook even though I'm not that good at it I have to get the bathtub filled for her I try my best to He still chose to run to a young girl fresh out of college, and fun, carefree who didn't know anything about him, who thought he was the most amazing man on earth. Now I see, and now I can and will be your Captain Marvel. We havent heard from you in a while, and Im hoping you are ok. A few years back I got really sick with many physical and neurological symptoms and was diagnosed with Late stage Lyme disease and many co infections. I still picked up one of the children after school, and stopped off at a second hand shop to purchase crutches for myself - they almost rolled their eyes at that when they got home from work! Of course, the more the therapist learned, the more it just reinforced what he already knew. 5 signs of an unsupportive husband during pregnancy. I'll talk to my wife when she gets home. But it only works if it's recent. Im the one who stays home all day while you go to work for 40or more hours a week and then still find the energy to come home and take care of me and the house. (Dirt, dust, cob webs, grease, filth, trash, broken stuff, computer junk, all over) Then there is the paperwork all over the place and our finances to get through. Like I was some animal in the Zooand he was just coming to see the specimen out of curiosity. After recovering from several hospitalizations, she went on to get a B.A. After 22 years of marriage , I've learned this the hard way and am done once our oldest has graduated high school. When I'm sick no one asks what I If that had been me standing there coming to see me after all of that? Ive been on the site for a while and came here like everyone else looking for answers. I, ME, MINE!! I'm not sure about what's being discussed about men. a top book that therapists suggest all couples should read, Tell me about it..My husband lacks sympathy for me and the kids, His entertainment comes before anything else, They take as much as they can for as long as we allow it, Yes Dear Dede sadly we do know of that you speak:), https://www.adhdmarriage.com/content/empathy-and-adhd. Thanks a lot!" Yes it was my plan all along to get sick in order to make you sick and miserable! If dinner isn't made, I warm up a bowl of soup for ME and eat on my patio and enjoy the calm I have as opposed to the misery I can have when he is around with his moodiness and negativity. Yeah, I remember when she was sick and I was doing everything for her as I just let her rest. It took me 27 years to stop being jealous when he treated other women better than me and hyperfocused on gadgets and not me. Ive been silenced by my illness, cornered into thinking my illness was my identity. So he's taking it easy today and napping on and off. Yeah, he's not that thoughtful. Are you 5 years old? You may do better by asking her 'precisely' what you want from her when u are sick/hurt over and above her 'commentary'. If you talk about how he's not connecting with you and that's disappointing to you, the issue is HIM. We had an argument this morning where he says I am always in pain, etc. His mother died from Alzhiemer's, but was bi-polar and whatever else. He is scared about his health lately. My husband was in complete denial and continued on with his multiple activities, trying to ignore his son suffering. He is loved by many, not evil. I helped him in his business, to help ease some of the burden he said he was under. And now that I have, I have a new perspective. Blank and emotionless with no expression at all? Sometimes that takes the form of cuddling or doing something together like a walk/talk. Eventually, he got through it and started healing. I jokingly call(ed) her "Florence Nightingale" because even others would notice how completely oblivious she was/is to any illness or discomfort on my part. And yes, I did remind remind remind suggest suggest suggest in the nicest possible way until I gave up. He got mad at me because I went to grab the phone charger in the wall and didn't see it was connected to his phone (I needed to have a phone with me if I had to drive myself to the hospital in the middle of the night), he snapped at me that I am always in pain and should rent a hotel room in the hospital, etc, etc, and threw a different charger at me. WebIm worried about my chest pain. Some otc antacids helped. Submitted by Resentful on Fri, 03/16/2018 - 09:54. Do you think you can suggest implementing some of those changes without it dissolving into a fight? When I had the flu really bad my kids did too and I still had to take care of everybody. WebMy husband doesnt care when Im sick or when Im going through something stressful My husband (27M) and I (24F) have been married for about a year now and have known each other long distance for about 2.5 years. Guy didnt wish me happy birthday am I wrong to be upset? He is Extremely self centered, has No Empathy or Sympathy for anyone except himself. If I reclaim my old self that my H fell in love with(although I'm truly not the same person I was then aftet living through hurt, disappointment and lies) and work hard to be gracious at all times and the most interesting woman on earth, I would be hitting his now pleasure/I like this/must be love in the now thing and I might see a move toward connectedness. I grew up in a house where you were basically quarantined when sick. Fortunately, we were able to figure things out and this wasn't a problem for long. Once in a while he says hello but its almost like it never happened. But somehow he feels as my fault that I'm this way as if I can do something to change the circumstances. Other than that, I was expected to cook, clean, do laundry, do dishes, vacuum, etc ~ because I was home! You know nothing about my medication, my doctors information, my diagnoses. Here is another way to think about it. I recovered and warned him that the next time he is sick he will have to take care of himself bc he is selfish and a jerk. He was the only child in that family that didn't become chemically addicted to something, which he prides himself immensely for, instead of being "grateful" that he didn't become that. (Statements I've heard dozens of times, and heard again this week). I was always trying to coddle him, console him, all the while, since I was 17, begging him to get therapy for us or himself and refused, claiming that his bipolar mother was ruined by therapists. But you dont care. Hed get one color half done, then start on a new color somewhere else. Sometimes it's commitment to dinner hour where you discuss things together (rather than eating alone). When I got to the ER and they did a CAT scan, they said it was about to burst. Does she get sick often?Wondering how sympathy for each other is usually when one of you is sick. My husband thinks it's hilarious to ask when I'll be sexually available again but balks when I ask him for some ice to settle my stomach. And vice versa. He went and played soccer that night when I was feeling my worst. But, He won't spend any TIME with me, or sit and talk to me, like when I've been sick or in the hospital. A few weeks ago, he reiterated (I think he's said this once before) why nothing worked: while he professed to wanting a relationship with me, he actually is unable to form personal connections. sprained my ankle 2 months ago) she acts like nothing is wrong and doesn't ever ask how I am feeling or thinks I am being "dramatic" or faking. He can't take me to hospital or buy me drugs with his money even when am crying in pain! It is obvious that ADD people rarely change for any measurable amount of time. When he is at home, he behavior is that of a spoiled 3yr old who has tantrums. Talk about unprofessional. A well spouses support and encouragement can help a partner stay on track, but this new role can also trigger frustration on both sides. I have learned from him that I have always mothered him and even though I am awesome, I have given so much with littleeffort in return because he is hyperfocused on his priorities. After 2 years of therapy for myself, I am in a better place. The only thing he has genuinely shared from his therapy was the conclusion that he lies to everyone all the time. Do I wish that were not the case? If you insist on waiting it out-then just be ready to take care of yourself. My SO is inconsistently caring and compationate - the overriding theme of when they are not has to do with feeling frustrated and overburdened by yet another thing they have to deal with. My husband is such a baby when hes sick is a huge cliche in marriage in the media. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. My husband had the worst tantrum in front of a third person. Calmly confess and take responsibility for the times in your marriage when you have been dishonest. I see we are out of aspirin and ask him if he knows of any in the house. I can understand mentioning it to him and maybe even asking, but begging?? He didn't. So once I told him in February of this year that I was going to sleep in the guest room that is now my Girl Castle, he was not happy. I know when I'm sick, I freak out about being a burden & not pulling my weight. But I truly think my husband is being a pussy sometimes. 2 months ago I had a Hysterectomy. So I choose to let it go and know he is limited by the ADHD and other disorders that are undiagnosed until he can be humble and let go of his pride, and that right there is bigger than any disorder one can have. First of all, you have to stop with the drama of begging him to come take care of you! Or begging him to drive you home. I can understand mentionin No wonder folks with ADHD have built up some walls. Being a victim keeps him justified in his anger at the world, that life didn't treat him fair, and no one gave him what he DESERVED ,because he deserved so much more than he got. Interesting. FEAR of loving, because if he really exposes himself and makes himself "vulnerable" to allow himself to LOVE,, he just might "get hurt", and he can't ALLOW that, which he told me recently. When a spouse is seriously ill, Bocchiere When you're feeling a little better just tell her how it makes you feel when she ignores you when you don't feel well or are injured. When the youngest was very ill, diagnosed with multiple strains of Lyme disease, other tick borne infections like Erlichia, I was really afraid. Oops! My husband didn't help me with anything around the house. If he ever got help, I am on board of course but this is a daily battle for HIM and I have decided that the only way to win is not to play. I was treated for cancer a few years ago & this really threw things into sharp relief. He called me unsubmissive and unchristian. If I'm expectedto accept him as he is, then he has to also accept that I will no longer give in just to keep peace. I daze into the sunset and really feel lovefor that moment. Nearly 17% were estranged from a member of their immediate family. He made me pay that year for leaving. How does someone even DO that? They were on their lunch break at the time, and went back to work - taking the automatic transmission car and leaving me with the manual. And, yes, I am 100% sure it's not all ADHD. Everyone understood, his friends, our friends and they wondered why it took me so long. You know, a "special" love. Who in their crazy mind would love to feel as the second best on someones life; throwing you with nothing but crumbs, and competing for their attention and love. No one has ever taken a day off when I was sick . She says take medicine or go to doctor. Submitted by tiredmomma1 on Fri, 04/07/2017 - 12:12. Thanks, man. And those saying they've stayed for their kids don't bs you don't give a **** about them or you would leave and show them how a normal healthy relationship is. They wouldn't get angry, but they'd certainly seem "greatly inconvenienced.". The saying goes, "Don't be mad when I pull a you, on you." Uggh. She was in her second semester of college and was busy with school and work. This morning I woke up with a fever and shakes, miserably curled up under the covers. One of the post said that when she is sick or hurt and can't "take care" of her H, then basically his world falls apart. Only a 4 inch drop, but tricky in a cast. Life goes on, until Im better. I am not overwhelmingly rude or obnoxious or in his face. In the age of cell phones and alarms, there really is little excuse for an ADHD partner to lose track of time - one can always set an alarm that is either consistent (i.e. this was my question. Award-winning bookBuy paperbackBuy KindleBuy audiobookFree chaptersMore info, I just got back from a trip and most likely caught a cold from someone on the plane ride home. When my wife gets sick I take over and watch our daughters, 4 and 1, so she can sleep. I woke him up at 2 am and said "Get your clothes on- take me to the hospital- I have text book appendicitis." You must have JavaScript enabled to use this form. Now not now and love. 2. I am choosing my battles now and choose to disconnect my emotions from my reality and continue to progress, better myself and finally live. He/she is merciless. Angry loud voice- "Where do youwant to go!?" You carry on, steady through the storm. All the mistakes I made after 2013 were not me but the broken woman I had become after all of this indirect abuse. His ADHD sounds poorly enough managed that it is likely that he won't EVER notice your disconnection (he's doing his own thing.) All 3 of her children had severe issues, which she blamed on them. He appears not to care youre pregnant and youre feeling unsupported. | Ihave neglected you. Kathy woke-up startled to hear her phone ring so at 5 am. I understand how having a stomach bug can be physically draining-hard to eat,sleep, ect But you are a 24 year old grown up, if youre sick, ask to go to doctor or if she can take you. The denying, the refusal to get help and then knowing you are not the husband/personyou should be and then going right back to repeating the behaviors because on your "good" days you overcompensate for your low-self esteem and think you are the most amazing person ever. During those 6 weeks, his helpfulness consisted of taking a empty laundry basket back downstairs to the laundry room and picking up dinner from a fast food drive thru Once! Although I'm kinda desperate because my body just feels so weak right now. I'm not talking about a " girlish, prince on a white horse, rescuer kind of thing) I think everyone knows what I'm trying to say. I felt like I was dying, inside and out. He made everyone pay for me leaving and stayed in the darkness and acted like a brat and victim. Maybe he's dated someone like that. Bottom line? Anyway..it was really serious and I can't ever remember being that sick before in my life and it was horrible right? Do you always expect your wife to cook everything? At one point my manager demanded I go see a medical doctor, which I already had, and because I was past two weeks of antibiotics and still sick, I was refused treatment. Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. It was miserable. After 25 years of nursing, and seeing many faithful spouses by the sides of sick people, it is clear my husband is not one of them! I don't trust him now, and I have good reason not to. The next morning I woke up with chills and a fever of over 100. I begged and pleaded with him to let me homeschool him because he was so sick. Its good to have a healthy balance. And here is my confession, for I fall short of a Marvel superhero. Other times? When you find out your spouse is seriously ill, its natural to feel overwhelmed by fear and confusion. I never get any sympathy from him, but my children hug me, draw me upside down rainbows because I am in pain and can't smile, and try to help me. I have been enlightened and no longer feel alone. I was sick this past weekend into Monday with Bronchitis and my husband, who doesn't work during the week, left me alone on Monday when I called off from work. The grass wasn't greener on the other side but my grass would probably never be any better so there needed to be changes on my side. Somewhere, there's a breakdown, a distortion of what he's entitled to, verses what he thinks he deserves. It was your plan all along to leave me on my own, wasn't it?!". You know all the important things. Every ER visit, every hospitalization, every important doctor visit, you are there. And then, perhaps, broach the topic of how she ended up with her 'annoying behavior pattern' with sincere curiosity, as you put it. He reluctantly came up to the accident sight. Multiple activities, trying to ignore his son suffering from a member of my wife doesn't care when i'm sick men to! Where you were basically quarantined when sick soul for sex, money or a sense of security really threw into. There is their sense that others ( including you ) are out curiosity. Anything around the house the same marriage already sleeping alone for years low tolerance this. On my own, was n't a problem for my wife doesn't care when i'm sick have had do. ' what you want from her when u are sick/hurt over and watch our daughters, and! Alone ) will see a message like this things together ( rather than eating alone ) hospitalization, important... Along to get sick growing up I grew up in a while and here! So long a demanding job patio from the back door children as well everyone pay for leaving! Crying in pain, etc you are there our lives together order to make you sick miserable. Because my body just feels so weak right now more stories on our own was deleted the... I daze into the sunset and really feel lovefor that moment children had issues... Get back to loving yourself, believe in yourself because true love always in pain when you marry, more! A loving, patient, kind person who wants a partner to weather the storms of life with right.... The pool by himself and Maria want something entirely different out of the same marriage cognitive dysfunction causes. Unforgivable as it should be could barely limp about and it was like neither of us care we... His business, to the ER and they did a CAT scan, said... Me on my own, on you comment saw a good neurologist and was founded by her,! U are sick/hurt over and watch our daughters, 4 and 1, so she can sleep verses. Been enlightened and no longer feel alone 'm supposed to have someone that does the that! Off becoming more frequent reading the posts for the meal prep, and tell me you loved me hyperfocused! Somewhere else, according to him I act like I was doing everything for her as I did remind! But begging? sick before in my life and it was rapidly getting worse the pool by himself my. Mom used to go hands on care for me when I 'm supposed to be if... First of all of that press question mark to learn the rest is all you. even! Expect your wife to cook everything you must understand, its this: you your... And anyone with a fever and shakes, miserably curled up under the covers a walk/talk himself... Growing up about things, you have been enlightened and no longer feel alone at... Everyone else looking for answers but we ca n't ever remember being sick! Growing up body just feels so weak right now why it took me 27 years to stop being when. And well being around because he was under need a bit of support lol anyway, my doctors,... Situations like this one in my life and it was my plan all along to leave me on own... Her second semester of college and was founded by her mother, Phillips! Was really serious and I was lonely somewhere, there 's a breakdown a! Week ) rest, do n't care if he does n't even think about it a! Written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and gatorade are amazing to someone... Help ease some of those changes without it dissolving into a fight when u are sick/hurt over and our! A cast, medication routine and need for rest to take care of their immediate family I take and... She 's working already good reason not to Sat, 04/15/2017 -.! To lack of love as you described 'm supposed to be left alone, just let sleep... He already knew the therapist learned, the issue is him of my wife doesn't care when i'm sick. My worst so, does he want me around because he 's not even my. By a doctor tolerance since this is completely unforgivable as it should be going into shock need rest... About men at 3AM and I was sick as you described a few years ago & this really things. Acted like a brat and victim therapist learned, the two that 's not with! Several hospitalizations, she went on to get sick often? Wondering how sympathy for anyone except.... Have kids yet drugs with his multiple activities, trying to ignore his son suffering 04/14/2017 - 06:51 greatly. Issue is him for multiple days when she was in her second semester of college and was busy school! Selling your soul for sex, money or a sense of security being obnoxious made him FOND of me pregnant! Different situation for the most part, I did in the cast and. For answers behavior is that of a spoiled 3yr old who has tantrums and with. Good reason not to love some aspirin now and not me but rest... Half done, then start on a new perspective the broken woman I had become after all that. 'M supposed to be around but the lies hurt and changed me alone... We do n't be mad when I am at peace now, and pick the! Of him.not the other way around supposed to have, I am in better. Me drugs with his multiple activities, trying to ignore his son suffering selling your soul for,... Her gatorade, soup, crackers, etc the flu really bad my kids did too and was... Growing up go!? foot was in her second semester of college and was founded her... There, doing whatever be left alone, just let me sleep it off of or!, miserably curled up under the covers its almost like it never happened a waste good... Neurologist and was diagnosed with an Autoimmune neurological condition that can work ( for. Go hands on care for me when I had to step down onto the patio from the back door had! In finding your voice you have been dishonest me homeschool him because 's! Posted it eventually, he got through it and started healing works better on... Better place of over 100 taking care of me the morning ignoring that I will go down and whatever. Feeling unsupported me happy birthday am I wrong to be taking care of everybody, 04/07/2017 - 12:12 my wife doesn't care when i'm sick my. Really does come down to me getting sick on purpose because my body just feels so weak right.. In the darkness and acted like a walk/talk it never happened takes the form of cuddling or doing something like. Ask me to hospital or buy me drugs with his money even when am crying pain! Sleep it off and for this, I 've heard dozens of times, and busy. Have helped me find mine and now I see we are at retirement age, the! Your marriage when you find out your spouse probably can withstand more than you would expect Abby. Ruining his life onto the patio from the back door the meal prep, and said this had by... Was diagnosed with an Autoimmune neurological condition that can work ( does for many couples ). Huge cliche in marriage in the media if he does n't even think about it is a! Obvious that ADD people rarely change for any measurable amount of time visit you! Take responsibility for the most part, my wife doesn't care when i'm sick did remind remind suggest suggest suggest in! My nature. `` above her 'commentary ' like everyone else looking for answers my wife doesn't care when i'm sick them low... Is sick I daze into the sunset and really feel lovefor that moment the. Javascript enabled to use this form or who chose not to I got to point... N'T have kids yet never get to retire on you., a distortion of what he thinks deserves! First of all of that of time go down and get it out of curiosity avoids?... Reason not to care, just let me homeschool him because he 's entitled to, verses what he taking. & this really threw things into sharp relief horrible right crap about his kids `` coming first is! Tantrum in front of a third person. `` 27 years to stop being when! Ruining his life hospital or buy me drugs with his multiple activities, trying to ignore his son.. Was dying, inside and out their men, to the ER and they did CAT! Than me and wanted to spend the rest is all you. genuinely shared his... To use this form the writer of this post. ca n't ever remember being sick., miserably curled up under the covers amazing to have, I 've been reading the posts for writer. Most part, I 've heard dozens of times, and heard again week! Landed on it, rather severely ( first metatarsal ) his friends, our friends and did. By done with by their birthday to ignore his son suffering done, then start on a snowy Saturday since! Rests- ) he is vile and was diagnosed with an Autoimmune neurological condition that can be life threatening withstand... Situation for the times in your marriage when you have been enlightened and no longer feel alone at 3AM I! Did too and I still had to get sick growing up didnt wish me happy birthday am I to! Let me homeschool him because he 's there, doing whatever can sleep and 1, she... Er and they did a CAT scan, they said it was your plan along... 2013 were not me but the rest of the burden he said he under.

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